Cheers to 40 Years! Pt. 3:Two Really Are Better Than One
(Read below or Click Here to Listen to the Podcast)
“Two are better than one, because they have a more satisfying return for their labor.” Ecclesiastes 4:9 AMP
Hey friends,
Welcome to Episode 4 of the Sanctuary Stirrings Fall Series-- and the third and final part of my conversation with my husband, Bryan, about the gift of marriage.
Before you quickly read on, take a minute and read the verse at the top of this email again, slowly.
Two are better than one. Better = stronger, richer, more fruitful...
In the past two episodes on the gift of long-term relationships, Bryan and I have shared the miraculous story of how God brought us together, along with what we’ve loved and learned through 40 years of marriage.
But as I prepared for this conversation, I kept coming back to this verse. It felt equally as important as the one we usually think of in Genesis, where God says, “It is not good for the man to be alone,” and promises to make “a helper suitable for him."
Because Ecclesiastes 4:9 isn’t only about those called together into the covenant of marriage. It's for ANY two, three, or more people who God calls together.
God doesn’t only bring us into relationships for companionship. One of the most significant reasons is to accomplish the good He longs to do in this world. Something miraculous happens through people working together that couldn't happen through any one of us alone.
Designed for Partnership
God loves partnership. We see it all the way back in the Garden of Eden when God invites human beings to join Him in stewarding His creation. It would be so much easier and more efficient for Him to do His work alone. But He knows the joy of togetherness. No matter how many times we fail, He will never sidestep His plan to partner with us in the work.
And in His love, He has designed us the same way.
He could have equipped each of us with every gift we would ever need to accomplish everything He calls us to do.
But He didn’t.
Instead, He gives each of us unique gifts, experiences, passions, and abilities—then brings us alongside others whose gifts complete our own.
Bryan and I have watched this truth come to life throughout our marriage as we raised our children, opened our home in hospitality, and led small-group ministry.
In recent years, we’ve seen it in an entirely new way through how God led us to build The Sanctuary at Bear Creek.
Here’s the beginning of that story from our website …
7 Years, 7 Days, and 7 Hours: How the Sanctuary at Bear Creek Was Born
On June 25, 2014, we closed on the property, pinching ourselves that God had brought us back to the land that we loved more than any place on earth. Sitting on the ridge where the cross now stands, with the last rays of the evening sun glistening on the water and fireflies lighting up the night with their mysterious glow, the moment was transfixed in time.
As we sat there, Bryan remembered the day we broke-heartedly moved away from the house we built next door and asked,
“What was the date we moved out?”
“It was June 18,” I replied.
“And what year was it?”
“2007.”
“Do you remember what time?”
There was no way I could forget.
“We had to be out by 1:00 p.m.”
“So... it has been seven years ... and seven days ...” and then looking at his watch, which read 8:00 p.m., “… and seven hours since we left--and God has brought us back again!”
It had never crossed our minds how these dates would fall until that moment. Then a vision came to Bryan, and he said,
“I see cabins dotted along the upper and lower ridges and people coming to spend time with God. I see churches bringing their staff and small groups coming to grow in love for God and one another. I believe God has separated this place as a Sanctuary where people can come and meet with Him.”
When we lived on the eight acres next door, we wanted it to be a place of blessing for our family and friends. But in this new season, God was showing us that the property was not only for our physical family but for our spiritual one … the Church.
(Click Here to Read the Full Article)
Designed to Work Together
Looking back, it amazes me how perfectly God prepares people—their gifts, talents, experiences, and passions—for the work He calls them to do, long before the call.
Bryan had lived in this area since he was 11 years old. He spent endless hours romping through these woods and splashing in the creek. This land and the surrounding Allegan State Forest became deeply embedded in his DNA.
God also gave him the gift of building. As the oldest son, he began alongside his father, building their family home just a quarter mile down the road from what would one day become The Sanctuary. It continued three months into our marriage with our first remodeling project and through the 30-plus houses Bryan built over the years to help support our growing family.
God gave him an exceptional ability to see the big picture—to look at a property covered with weeds and woods--and envision what it could become decades down the road.
Meanwhile, God had been doing a completely different work in me.
More than 20 years earlier, a woman came to my mom’s support group and invited each of us to come to her home and spend Days alone with God (DAWG days)—to love on Him and let Him love on us. With six children, from 13 years old down to six months, whom I was homeschooling, I had no idea how I'd get there. But I knew I needed to.
So, I started going.
Those days changed my life, filling a hunger for intimacy with Jesus that I’d been missing amid the busyness of adult life, family, work, and ministry. Over the years, I went every few months. And eventually, a little prayer began growing in my heart:
Lord, maybe someday You could give me a place that I could offer to others, where they could come and spend time alone with You as this precious woman has done for me and so many others.
I don’t know if I ever told Bryan about that prayer. And when this property came back to us, surprisingly, it never crossed my mind that perhaps this could be that place.
Holy Oblivion
Instead, God put the vision in Bryan’s heart. And I love that.
If God had put the idea in my mind first, I could have brought it to Bryan, nudging—and maybe even nagging!—“Hey, what if we built some cabins? Wouldn’t it be wonderful to invite people here to spend time alone with God?”
Instead, in His wisdom, God kept me in what I like to call holy oblivion and ignited the vision — in one unforgettable moment — in Bryan’s heart. The instant he said it, I was blown away. It made perfect sense.
Here we were, on the cusp of the empty-nest years, wondering what God might have for us next. And in a split second, He gave us a glimpse of the answer.
A New Yoke
A new calling, perfectly suited to the gifts He had been developing within each of us for decades.
And I believe He works in similar ways in every one of our lives.
He forms us individually. At just the right time, He brings our gifts together with others and invites us to step forward. Strapping on a new yoke with Jesus right in the middle, we walk out a calling that none of us could--or would ever want to--fulfill alone.
There may be more blood, sweat, tears, hard work, and perseverance than we ever imagined. But there will also be indescribable joy.
Because two truly are better than one.
Click here to watch Part 3: Two Really Are Better Than One on YouTube
Pause, Ponder, and Pray
When you look back over the years of your life ...
Who do you see—a spouse, a friend, a family member, or someone in your church—whom God has placed along your path for His purposes?
How about today?
Who might God be inviting you to come alongside in this season? And what might He do through you together that neither of you could do alone?
Worth Noticing: Resources Connected to this Article
Cheers to 40 Years! The Gift of Marriage
Cheers to 40 Years, Pt. 2: In It for the Long Haul
7 Years, 7 Days, & 7 Hours: How the Sanctuary at Bear Creek Was Born
Worth Remembering:
“Our deeds become an element in God’s eternal history. They are what God and we do together.” Dallas Willard, The Divine Conspiracy
So thankful to be journeying together,
Bryan & Lori